Anger
by Edwin Harkness Spina
After fear, anger is probably the next most debilitating
emotion that humans must confront. Unlike fear, anger is a
complex emotion. And unlike fear, which usually paralyzes,
anger can spur you to take action, though not necessarily in
a beneficial way. Reacting to anger-provoking events will
usually make things worse.
If you analyze why you or anyone else ever gets angry, it's
almost always because expectations did not match reality.
Here's a simple example: You order butter pecan ice cream
from a Baskin Robbins store and they tell you they don't
have any. You're angry. Why? Because you expected to get
butter pecan ice cream from an ice cream store with 31
flavors, but the reality was they didn't have any.
Now, if you had ordered ice cream from a Starbucks and they
told you they didn't have any, you wouldn't be so angry.
Why? You still didn't get your ice cream, but since coffee
shops don't generally serve ice cream, you wouldn't have
expected to get any.
Not getting what you want by itself does not make you angry
- only when your expectations are not met do you get angry.
Expectation is a quality of the mind. We have built up our
expectations based upon our past experiences and how we've
interpreted them. We then project these expectations into
the future.
Consequently, anger is a quality of the mind. As such, "folk
remedies" such as jumping, running or punching a bag or
pillow will be largely ineffective. Following these
suggestions will make you tired, but you'll still be angry.
And yelling at people whenever you feel angry is also
counterproductive. (Not to mention, increasing the
likelihood of receiving a beating from people who don't
appreciate getting yelled at.)
The pop psychology "let it out" anger reactions are also
mostly unproductive. This is because as a mental quality,
you cannot use lower vibrational, physical energy to diffuse
your anger. As Einstein said, "No problem can be solved at
the same level of consciousness that created it."
This means you can't use physical means, or even a mental
means, to solve a mental problem.
You need to invoke a higher level of consciousness.
You need a spiritual approach.
What to do?
Immediately accept the reality of the situation and become
fully present.
Only when you are present can you consciously decide if it's
best to take action now or continue to accept the reality.
Do not resist the reality. Your only two healthy choices are
to act or to accept.
Complaining is nonacceptance, which will perpetuate your
anger. It turns you into a victim, which the Law of
Attraction tells us will bring you even more of the stuff
you're complaining about.
Suppressing your anger is also nonacceptance. You still have
your anger; you just buried it. It will still attract more
anger, and, most likely, it will resurface when you least
expect it.
You must act or accept.
Anger has no benefit, other than to tell you that you are
acting unconsciously, that is, REACTING, based on habit or
past experience. Getting angry is a habit that we all have
experienced. If you catch yourself, you have taken a step
towards higher consciousness.
Here's a more specific example: You're attending your annual
performance review. You did a great job for your company and
expect a pay raise. You present all your accomplishments to
your boss, pointing out the value you added to your company,
and you request a raise. Your boss says "no."
What should you do?
Remember, act or accept. Anger has no place in this
equation. You've already acted to give yourself the best
chance for a raise. Further action, at this time, is not
likely to change things. Given this, you must accept the
situation completely and totally, without judgment or anger.
Assume that everything is exactly as it's supposed to be.
You were not supposed to get a raise. The universe conspired
to get you exactly what you and your higher self requested.
This could be the stimulus to get you to take enlightened
action in another direction. You will want to meditate and
figure out what that is. Then you can choose to act
consciously to create the preferred reality that matches
what you want.
This may involve updating your resume and networking with
industry contacts for a new job. Or it may involve working
on plans for your own business. In either case, taking
conscious action will uplift you. You will be amazed at the
amount of abuse you can tolerate, when you know that the
situation is only temporary because you are taking action to
create the reality that you want. You don't even have to
tell anyone else; all you need to know is that you are
taking enlightened action. Your spirit will soar.
The fundamental principle at work here is that you are not
your mind. Since expectations are creations of the mind,
they are not needed. Your true self is beyond the mind.
In a longer term course of action, you will want to dis-
identify from or eliminate the thoughts and emotions lodged
in your energy bodies that are framing your expectations. In
many cases, these thoughts, feelings and beliefs are not
even yours! They were instilled in you by your parents,
teachers, religious leaders, peers, co-workers, bosses, the
media, etc. You accepted them and they are framing your
experience of reality today.
When you recognize this is what's happening, you will more
easily release them. One of the best ways to do this is
while meditating; by being fully present with the single-
minded intention to clear them from your being. We will
discuss this more fully in the next newsletter.
Best wishes,
Ed
P.S. Your feedback is welcomed - please send your comments to me at:
ehspina@mysticwarrior.us
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