Emerald Energies - A Delightful Spiritual Retreat

Connection
Kypris

July 6th, 2005

Recently I’ve been struggling with the challenge of how to disconnect from people that I love when I’m not interacting with them. All my life, abandonment has been my largest fear, and I’ve tried to soothe myself by clinging so tightly to people that they haven’t been able to breathe. Now, freefalling into a divorce and shared child custody and connections with new and old friends, I find I want to do things differently, to find a new way of being in relationship that is connected and yet separate–a balance between intimacy and solitude.

As I’ve struggled with this, the hardest part has been my feelings of isolation when I disconnect from an interaction, horrible, overwhelming feelings of aloneness. I’ve talked with my tantric teachers, experts in love with non-attachment, and they’ve all told me this is the primary task of tantric loving–love without attachment. But none were able to tell me exactly how to manifest this feat.

The best clues have come recently, from some very wise women I am privileged to be in sisterhood with. They have reminded me that when we feel isolated and sad when alone, it’s a reminder that we need to nurture ourselves. This was a vital clue for me.

This weekend, I finally “got it”. Practicing tantric yoga with a new friend, I realized that it’s not a matter of disconnecting and reconnecting with a person, it’s a matter of going between connection to *another*, and connection to *myself*. I can never be alone, because *I* am always there for me. Through being connected to myself, I am connected to the entire divine universe, because the universe and I are one.

Here lies peace, contentment, and fullness.

Namaste, Kyrpis

Shamanic tantra is a spiritual journey into a passionate creative life that includes a full and rich sexual connection to God. Initiated on this path by a powerful shamanic healer, Kypris has journeyed in search of spiritual wisdom, beauty, and the open heart through many places on Mother Earth: walking the witch-hunting hills of Salem, MA; bathing in the healing waters of Tahiti and Hawaii, and making love to the austere deserts of Sedona and Anza-Borrego. With the roots of her spiritual practice in Wicca, Kypris was led to tantra through visions of Aphrodite and Shiva, and transformed through solo practice of ritual, energy channeling, bellydance, and yoga. Led to her tantric partner by a powerful shamanic dream, Kypris practices tantra today in tandem, and works as a spiritual coach, healer, and teacher. Kypris holds a master's degree in Molecular Biology and Biochemistry, as well as a master's degree in Counseling Psychology, and is an initiated HeartWisdom Tantric Priestess. She is the author of the forthcoming Journey to Sexual Wholeness, The Six Gateways to Tantric Sexuality.